First of all Happy new year, Boys and Girls. May this 2020 be a achieving, happy, joyful and transformative year.
This post is not a 2019 – 2020, new year post. But an even grander 2009 to 2019 decade post. But why? Because I complete 30 years of age with 2019 and entering the much frightened Middle age, but with a full curious mindset on what awaits next.
Disclaimer: Dont expect a serious writeup here. This is just a quick, casual post to start 2020 with a bang.
So a dozen changes between 2009 and 2019:
1. College – Career
- Was studying 3rd year of my college. B. Tech. IT, in MNM Jain Engineering college
- Was running my dream company, Gethu Games, with a dream team.
- From trying to understand the external Universe through Science (2009)
- To trying to understand the Inner Universe, through Spiritual shit (2019)
- But I am still lost in all my searches
3. Belief Systems
- From a staunch Atheist (2009) to a Spiritual Agnostic (2019).
4. View on Governance
- From spending all my time complaining about Corrupt politicians, Evil Governments (2009)
- To getting an understanding that those corruption / evil are all just summation of all little little corruption spread across the Individuals (2019)
- and what’s my thoughts (and possibly contribution) to fix the decentralized corruption among individuals (A separate post in these lines is scheduled for January, 2020)
- From Should try walking to College one (14 kms) (2009)
- To attempted walking to Mahabalipuram (50 kms) from Saidapet with my dear friend, Alexraj (2011).
- From “Should try cycling to Marina once” (2009)
- To “Crossed my state, Tamil nadu (~750 kms) in Cycle on a Road safety awareness campaign by Thozhan with 7 other comrades” (2017)
- From “10 hours of sleep won’t be enough for me” (2009)
- To “Wow. I slept quality 6 hours today and now feel completely rejuvenated to take on the day” (2019)
- From “Looking at all mountains, while travelling to my Native and dreaming of climbing them one day; Looking at wallpapers, photos of mountains, waterfalls, forests” (2009)
- To “Have epic, intense solo / group trek experiences, which cannot be documented for obvious reasons” (2019)
9. Intro -> Extrovert
- From self declared Introvert, sitting in Comfort zone (2009)
- To “I am whatever Gotham needs me to be, I am Batman” type of Extrovert, only when situations needs me to be (2019)
- From a “Zero confident weirdo” (2009) to “Over confident Psycho” (2019)
- From “Will I ever get laid in my life???” (2009)
- To “No. I don’t think I have time for that now” (2019)
- From “I should get married soon (so I can have daily sex)” (2009)
- To “Marriage? I am still a kid. Give me time to grow up first” (2019)
- From “Watching Dragon Ball Z” (2009)
- To “Watching Ball Super” (2018)
- Few things never change, I guess
Life Miracle – Dec 2019 – Divine Intervention
My blog readers also know me as `Lonely Masturbator`, a strong proponent of Self pleasure and Sex. But ever since I read and started following Swami Vivekananda @ 2014, I became aware of the higher possibilities of transforming sexual energy into higher spiritual energies. But when I try to apply it to myself, it was all absolute fails.
I made super serious attempts at `Raja Yoga` and made very good progression on other temptations like food, sleep, ego, laziness, etc., But when it comes to Lust, I fail at Round 1. The max I stretched myself was around 30 days of No masturbation with pure Will power. But on the 31st day, with all pressure on my head, I will have eyes of an Rapist. That’s what I become. So then I immediately cool it down.
And then around 1.5 years back, when I started doing Shambavi Mahamudhra practice from Isha, it helped me to reduce the frequency a little. But not much significant (probably because I dont do it proper and regular).
But just in last 1.5 months, a unbelievable miracle is happening in my life. I am counting 40th day today of No Masturbation and I am still calm and composed inside. No pressure, No stress. And this is definitely not happening through my Will power. But because of something else, which I call `A Divine Intervention`. Infinite Gratitude to the Cosmos for making this a reality in my life.
So very curious to know, where/how this helps me in my personal transformation. Looking forward to 2020 and my Middle age.
Also expecting seriously to get back to my Roots in 2020. Stage seems to be set for that 😀